FAC Insights: When you have to GO so you can GROW by Tabi Gazele

FAC Insights is a forum for us to showcase and share long form pieces looking at various parts of the music industry and the society that shapes it. Pieces take the form of videos, interviews, discussions, articles and more. This week we are delighted to share this opinion piece written by the talented artist, songwriter and FAC member Tabi Gazele.

When you have to GO so you can GROW by Tabi Gazele

A personal thought: In order to give a perfect seed the chance for it to grow to its full potential, you have to make sure it gets planted and nurtured in the right environment. Why discard a fruit and blame it for being bad or off when we know that anything planted in the wrong place stops it from being able to fully develop and flourish.

I had this epiphany a few years back when I was living in Australia, the country where I was born and raised by my Nigerian parents at a time that I was becoming frustrated and fed up with the harsh reality of how hard it would be for me to be the artist I had envisioned and it has never left me since, so much so that I decided to do something about it. I guess you could say a few life experiences happened to collide at the same time that helped me to build up the courage to move to the UK with no promise of better, just a glimpse of hope that maybe it was where I was meant to be. I had been a professional singer for years working in corporate/party bands and then I toured as a backing vocalist with some incredible artists and over time I focused more on developing my own music and artistry. I had a burning desire to be that girl singing in the front whose songs would inspire people just like so many other artists had done for me. I was able to gain a unique understanding of how the music industry worked from working and touring with Jessica Mauboy, and watching my brother Timomatic who were both Sony Australia artists and they’re still doing incredibly well. I made lots of connections, saw how their teams worked with them in all the facets of the biz and I was excited to take all of that knowledge and apply it to my music. The problem for me was that when I went to present myself and ask for meetings, advice, artist development opportunities the doors were firmly shut, I was told I was too niche and that there was no room for me. It didn’t take me too long to realise that the niche they were referring to was me being a dark skinned black woman because I wrote heavily pop influenced music and if I wanted to do music, I needed to find other pathways for myself to be seen and heard. I was discouraged for some time but I always got great feedback from my shows so I knew I had something of value to offer but then it just clicked, maybe this wasn’t the place for me.

I don’t know if it was strictly because of my soulful tone or maybe the way I looked also but people would consistently ask if I was from the UK. Not just Australians, Brits visiting Oz would come up to me and say that they could see me singing at places like “The Jazz Café”. I was definitely amused. More and more I was convinced that my vibe wasn’t at the time going to be as widely accepted in Australia as it could be somewhere else. I had never been to the UK before but I started to feel drawn to the place. In 2014, I visited for a couple of days while on a European holiday, then in 2015 while taking part in Xfactor Australia and making it through to home visits, of all the places in the world that we could go they announced on the day that we were flying out to London that night. For me that was another sign and as I walked through Kings Cross I remember saying to myself “I need to be here”. It was such a strong feeling that I couldn’t shake and 6 months later with the support of my ex-husband we’d packed up and moved to the UK.   

The reformed impatient perfectionist in me has thought about leaving the music industry a few times to do something else that doesn’t come with as much uncertainty and anxiety because it can all get to be a bit too much and some early big pay-offs would’ve been really nice, but it’s been my faith in God that somehow through it all I’d be okay and meet the right people and find great opportunities for me because I know making music is what I do and I had to trust that I’d be looked after along the way as long as I just showed up every day and did my best. You know I thought it would be an easy transition. Finding musos, producers, management, labels, friends etc. I imagined it wouldn’t take me long because I believed that I worked hard and was legit, everyone would embrace me…… uhhh nah I couldn’t have been more wrong. I was a stranger who needed to prove myself. I had to learn and embrace the new culture, not just expect to take from it. I had to understand who I was because for so long, me a Nigerian-Australian girl,  was one of the rare black singers who got called in to do lots of different things in Australia and that wasn’t something I could rely on anymore to make me unique, I had to discover who I really was. Fast forward to more life changing moments, I can say that being forced to stop and re-assess everything when the Pandemic started was tough. My marriage had just come to an end, the gigs that I was so proud to have gotten were gone along with the income that I was relying on and it made me question was it ever a good idea to have come here in the first place if I’m honest because I felt sad and isolated. In that season I experienced so much growth in my career through building up my team, collaborating, writing the songs I’ve always wanted to write, connecting to people and building community in really authentic ways especially in music.

Don’t get me wrong I love Australia, I still connect and collaborate with home as much as I can, and the music industry is definitely great and is embracing more diversity and equality in ways that are starting to get me excited but for me, I’ve just found so much support here. There are many resources/platforms available for independent artists and these are just some of the ones that I’ve had direct support from: Cre8ing Vision, Help Musicians: Do It Differently Fund, PRS: Women Make Music Fund, Arts Council of England, Readipop Music Charity, BBC Music Introducing, FAC, Musician’s Union, BAPAM.

I was made aware of the PRS PowerUp fund earlier this year and I have to say I became very emotional filling out the funding application for a few reasons. Firstly, the acknowledgement of the barriers to progression within the music industry that have affected black people and also seeing that there are people out there who are determined to change it by providing support beyond just having a conversation, it was so deep for me. I let out a big sigh because sometimes you don’t give yourself the permission to pull down the protective shell you put up just as a means to survive in a place where the odds are heavily stacked against you. I cried because I wish that moving to the other side of the world would mean that I wouldn’t have to face the same struggle and pains that I tried to leave behind but the reality is there is still such a long way to go. It was hard recounting the times that I was discounted from opportunities because of being a dark-skinned black woman. My sister asked me the other day, “Tabi do you think being a black woman has had a negative effect on your music career?” I guess I’m glad that she had to question it earnestly because I don’t want to let anything stop me from achieving my goals so I try not to see myself as a victim but yes, I can say it has.

My final thoughts that I’d like to share are these. Don’t be afraid to dream big for things in your life that seem way beyond what you can already see. Look around you and ask yourself, is the place that you’re currently in helping you to grow and can you flourish there? If the answer is no, do the best that you can to find the right environment for you to be your best and be amazing. Believe in your own sauce, find the places and people that will cheer for you, support you, encourage you, truly see you and help you to win because it won’t be easy and learn to trust the process. Sometimes you may have to leave home and everything that’s familiar and comfortable to you to get to that place but trust me, if that’s where you’re meant to be, you won’t regret it. I certainly don’t.

Wishing you success, blessings and happiness always.
Tabi Gazele 

You can check out Tabi Gazele Live with her band live at her upcoming Headline show at the Old Queen's Head on the 27th October, click this link for event info and tickets